It had been a long time since he stopped researching [Settings]. It was much harder to live through every second of this madness. As he stopped stabbing and researching [Settings], countless thoughts that were pushed away by his repeated routines came rushing back into his mind.
What was he doing here? Why did he need to go through this?
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Jaehwan unleashed his world power against the darkness. He did it again and again until there was no world power left within him. The world power did not come back. Jaehwan felt his 'humanity' crumbling.
Why did he need to destroy the System? Was it really necessary? Everyone hated it. Everyone was afraid. No, actually, he was already a part of the System.
Jaehwan cried at the countless lines in his unique world. The crying went on for a while.
-Isn't it dangerous now?
-Yeah.
-It's too much even for him. 1.8 million years. Are you serious? How can a man withstand 1.8 million years?
-So what are you going to do? There's no going back if he goes mad.
Silence fell between the countless shadows. Then a voice came.
-Let's wait a bit more.
1 million, 850 thousand years.
Jaehwan could only think of one thing.
Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Kill me....
And at some point, he stopped.
1.9 million years.
...
1 million, 950 thousand years.
Was it real? A voice came from somewhere.
-Hey. Get some rest.
-We'll help you from here on out.
And then Jaehwan fell unconscious.
He wasn't sure what happened from then on.
7.6 million years. The clock kept on tracking time. Jaehwan lost consciousness very often. It all felt like a long dream. He sometimes came back to his senses and heard voices talking to him.
-Hey, it's okay. Go back to sleep.
"Uh, what? Uh…"
And Jaehwan fell back into his slumber.
11 million years.
25 million…
36 million…
Time went on. Even when he was asleep, Jaehwan felt and heard a lot of information. He was able to acquire a lot of information in his faint consciousness. It was valuable information that he never would have come across within [Depth].
46 million…
In his long dream, Jaehwan was swimming through a sea of consciousness. What was a being? What was consciousness? What was death? What was a world? What was a universe?
Many questions floated inside his head.
'Maybe everything is a dream after all?'
The time he had lived inside this darkness was 3,000 times more than all the time he had spent on Earth, in the Tower, in [Chaos], and in the [Depth]. Jaehwan wasn't sure where his 'world' was, the one that he was supposed to live in.
'What is reality?'
Everything seemed like a daydream. Everything that he held dear seemed pointless now. Maybe Beastlain was right. Jaehwan now realized the truth.
Justice? Value? Reasons?
It all became pointless. All his fights and the trials he faced were all pointless.
Large questions attacked his consciousness, and he succumbed to them every time. Yes. That was a human being. A mere, powerless, and pitiful human.
A speck of dust in a universe.
And yet, every time he succumbed to the questions, there were voices that brought him back up.
-Don't think stupid, stupid!
-We will think for you!
-We'll take care of your thoughts.
-Just shut up and think about how you will kick that bastard's ass!
Jaehwan wasn't sure who they were, but he knew that they were trying to save him. Who were they? Why were they helping him out in such a way?
The only thing Jaehwan could do was close his eyes again before his mind was destroyed.
150 million years passed.
In a deep dream, Jaehwan felt that he was inside a great cycle of Ouroboros. A giant circle that repeated everything. An endless cycle.
Within that cycle, little by little, Jaehwan understood more of this universe. For example, he understood what 'clothes' were.
It was the power from the System. It had a way to show itself and cover itself. The power was created through the looks. Another consciousness would be created when the world and the System collided.
Realization swept through Jaehwan's spirit. He felt like he would understand the System. It felt like he would understand the meaning of its existence and the point of this space. The universe was about to give birth from within him. And then the voice came.
-That's enough.
"What? What do you mean?"
-That's where you stop thinking.
"Why?"
-If you go past that, you will never come back.
"Never come back?"
-You will no longer be human.
"Human… am I still human?"
-Yes. You are still human.
Jaehwan felt like he was crying. The voice continued,
-If you go past that, you cannot stay as a 'being' anymore. Crossing the boundary of a 'being' is different. When you go beyond that point, you will lose your 'humanity' and will be unrecognizable from then on.
Jaehwan felt like he could barely understand. It probably had to do Myad's warning to be wary of time. However, Jaehwan wanted to know. He came all the way here, so he wanted to see what was beyond. The truth beyond that universe. The secret behind this vast world.
And the end of everything…
The voice came again.
-You will deny all those times you lived. Is that what you want to do?
Jaehwan's thoughts stopped at the voice. Deny his existence?
-Yes. You will lose your purpose. You will lose the reason for coming here, and all those times you endured will be lost. You will leave this world without a purpose.
There was a universe telling him to come from afar. He just needed to go a bit closer. Just a bit more and everything was going to be over. But he couldn't move. Every part of him was telling him to not go there.
-Don't worry. Let us handle it.
The voice spoke with most assuring and soothing voice possible. It was really reassuring. Jaehwan did not walk towards it anymore and the universe began to fade away.
-And you stay human.
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