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Chapter 270: They Are Getting Hugs, Sweets, And Pocket Money, But Since It Is Old Ladies I’M Not Envious At All.

Chapter 270: They Are Getting Hugs, Sweets, And Pocket Money, But Since It Is Old Ladies I’M Not Envious At All.
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Chapter 270: They are getting hugs, sweets, and pocket money, but since it is old ladies I’m not envious at all.

Day 66 – Morning, the Souvenir Store, the Capital Outskirts Branch

What do we do? We now have a base inside the Capital. If taking the city is the only goal then there is nothing left for us to do.

And there is even a fortress standing outside. It’s packed with the Frontier’s troops and the Royal Guard so we are free to take the Capital and the Royal Palace as we please.

Inside the walls there are 20 girls with levels over 100, or rather, with a Dungeon Emperor inside wouldn’t it normally be considered over for a city?

For the Kingdom, for the Second Prince himself, it’s already a checkmate. But I have to continue plundering the Confederation, and when it finally becomes unable to sustain the support the Capital will automatically fall. That’s where Meripapa-san and Royal Girl come in. Until then there is no reason not to continue economical warfare(ripping off) and expanding the Confederation’s losses? and I mean, it’s a business opportunity?

But the First Prince’s Army without the First Prince, or rather, that’s Church henchmen army, or rather old man fetish army? Anyway, it seems it will still take a while until the army of old men fetishists arrives, or rather, 『Advent of the army of old men fetishists 』 sounds too scary! It sounds so dangerous, that it involuntarily makes one want to shout for every old man in the Frontier to run away! They are taking so long… I might forget all about this in 18 seconds or so?

Now, for the two days until the Church’s Something Army arrives I should be able to stay here, if the Church’s Something Army gets delayed even more we will have additional leeway.

But since I still can’t get a read on the movements of the real force we can’t afford to just keep Murimuri Castle undefended. After all, even Meripapa-san is here now. What else should I do at the Capital? They had no bookstores, and with provision rations there are no food stalls, rather, the souvenir store has a total monopoly on the industry at the moment. The girls went through the stores, buying up any relatively good equipment, but clothes and stuff seemed to be pretty shabby. The place has already lost to the Frontier in development.

Today, 『Souvenir Store, Sort of Orphanage Branch? Kind of?』 is in the middle of a rip-off called Opening Sale, and thanks to orphans doing their best, there is no problem with staff shortage, despite the number of visitors, or rather, the kids are super popular? It seems that even in the Capital, while the nobles and the Confederation’s merchants and their associates are like that, the common people are not that different from the Frontier in the way they carry themselves?

Hearing that they can now enter the slums, the entrance to which was previously barred to them by the nobles controlling the district, they brought a huge volume of supplies, meanwhile, the children were in complete confusion as ladies that came for shopping were hugging them in tears, and giving them candies and pocket money.

In other words, it means that those lovely nobles were also 『taking care』 of the donation from the citizens. The culture clubs girl with Librarian at the head were so pissed when they heard that yesterday that they spent the entire night sending gifts to the Aristocratic District in the form of 『Nightmare』, 『Hallucination』, 『Phantom Pain』, 『Confusion』, and 『Upheaval』. Making them angry seems really scary, so let’s be careful. Failing to resist that is a huge problem.

Anyway, now we know the enemy, the issue is the Royal Family.

That’s why I came to ask them, hence the gathering.

Well, the Royal Prince is noisy, so he seems to be in quarantine outside the Capital. For some reason, I feel a lot of sympathy for the way he is treated, I wonder why?

The Second Prince sitting in the Capital is just a yes-man of the Confederation, so that can be released into the wild, the First Prince sitting in the storage might also be released back to its pig friends in the woods, the problem is that there also seem to be other Princes, from the Third to the Fifth? Should I actually finish off this playboy King? I mean, he has five wives, just who does he think he is? And because of such stratified society feeble highschool boys without Affection Rating can’t meet any beautiful ladies and are forced to deal with middle-aged men every single day! Hogging five all to himself is a death penalty according to the Highschool Boy’s Antimonopoly Law, a transgression that hardly can be forgiven!

Royal Girl is fine. She should’ve realized it yesterday. To save the Kingdom it has to be destroyed first. If the Kingdom is to continue to exist the Kingdom must be eliminated. And she must’ve resolved herself. Getting liked by the orphans she was playing with them and going around hugging them in tears. It somehow felt like she was picking only girls, but it surely is alright? Or is it better to report her? Public safety concern?

Since the Middle-aged Royal Prince is a middle-aged man I have no idea about him, so Meripapa-san can deal with him as a fellow middle-aged man. He is still running around with his worthless head trying to turn it in somewhere to save the country and protect the Kingdom, you know?

According to the Stalker Girl Clan’s investigation the Third and so on Princes have no connections abroad, their mothers do not come from great noble houses, and don’t have any other suspicious backing. Also, as the remaining Princes are still young, their future disposition depends on the education they’ll get. In addition, the Fifth Prince is a full brother to Royal Girl, sharing the same mother. With the influence from such a sister he might become an Assault Prince but he definitely won’t become corrupt. Alright, let’s make sure he won’t be sent to study under Meripapa-san. He must be the cause of that! Just what did they think there is to learn from him?

And the biggest issue is that Douche/Playboy King. After he fell ill the Kingdom was engulfed in turmoil, with foreign nations exploiting it as they please, bringing it to the brink of ruin, in other words, before he collapsed he actually managed this entire situation somehow. Even though he is playing around!

The path is going to differ depending on whether we should restore this King or enthrone a new one. History depends on it, so we cannot afford to let emotions influence the decision. We have to objectively review only the facts, and make a logical decision. His achievements are numerous, fighting with nobles he was able to obtain concessions from them, and sought to provide for his people, even trying to touch up on the slums situation. The reason for the Kingdom’s economical struggles seems to be his open challenge to the Theocracy and the Confederation, as recognizing the Beastmen Country he also was raising objections to the Church’s technological monopoly and the Confederation’s unsavory trade practices, which lead to economic blockade, but he still refused to bend, and protected the Kingdom’s pride, also making sure to chip away at the power of the greedy nobles that were colluding with the foreign states. However, unable to work out the solution for the Frontier’s funding, he was forced to sell even the Royal Family’s treasures to provide aid, and then one day, he suddenly collapsed. And everything took a sharp turn for the worse.

While what he was doing is commendable, he made too many enemies, and it is also the fact that in the end the economic blockade was weakening the country. What also bothers me is his softness, despite the circumstances no nobles were stripped of their titles or parted with their heads. This might be harsh, but this is a decision based on objective reality. I mean, he has five wives, you know? Yeah, since he is a Playa King he was playing around, playing arguing with others, playing fighting, and then playing collapsed? I’m sure if he gets healed he will first ask if there are any cute girls around!

「Alright! Not only is he a middle-aged man but he also has five wives, definitely not a decent person, that’s what I decided. This is a cool, objective, and just decision. I mean, he is too much of a player~.」

「Wait, Haruka-kun, he might be a little eccentric but he is not playing around? He was a proper King, without a single ally around, as myself too was unable to move away from the Frontier, he still kept protecting the pride of the Royal Family, always keeping his subjects in mind, yes he is a bit short-tempered and was in dispute with the great nobles, the Church, and the Confederation, but he was still working hard. He has both wits and talent, he is a bit prone to snapping, but deep down he is a kind person, he might be a bit frivolous, but he is capable of properly estimating the situation and well… He is a bit of a player but he is a good person?」

「「「So he is a player!」」」

Aight, let’s burn the Player King along with the silly nobles. Surely, if turned to ashes there won’t be another outbreak.

「Father, the King, is an admirable person. I beg you, if you save the King I will devote my life to Haruka-sama. No one but the Kingdom can save the Kingdom. And if it’s the King, he surely will be able to create a great kingdom that the predecessors were aiming for, surpassing good kingdoms of old. He collapsed before he could fulfill that ambition, but please, Haruka-sama… Please, save the King.」

「Haruka-kun, I also ask you the same. I’m well aware that I’m in no position to ask anything of you, as well as I understand that there is no value to the word of an incompetent lord that almost destroyed the Frontier, even so, please. I will do anything that I can. If you tell me to charge into the Theocracy or the Confederation I will do it immediately, just say the word, anything! So please… Haruka-dono, save our King, save my friend…」

Hm? The Player King supporters faction is in majority? No, in democracy numbers are the power, and we have 21 girls on our side!

「「「「Haruka-kun, they are asking this hard, let’s help them? If we have an issue after saving the King, then we can think it over later?」」」」

Even the girls took the other side! So this is the power of the Playboy King! What a terrible power, waking up this Player King is dangerous.

I should properly point out issues right now. Royal Girl is his daughter and Meripapa-san is his friend, in other words, they are personally invested. The girls are simply sympathizing with them instead of making a conscious level-headed decision, so with their clouded vision they are missing the biggest problem. This is not the issue here, you know?

「Everyone has too many personal feelings involved in this. This is about the Crown and the State, so instead of getting swept up by emotions we have to consider this matter in terms of political judgment, economic merit, and military advantage when making a decision? There is no room for feelings there, and if you do allow them to come into play you won’t be able to make the correct decision? Everyone is averting their eyes from the main point of this issue, overlooking, and closing your eyes on the problem, but this old man has five wives! It’s outrageous, infuriating, I’m burning with rage! I mean, it’s five, FIVE wives!」

「「「「You are the one who is super emotional about this! Actually, there was nothing but personal feelings!」」」」

I got scolded?

They even started a sermon. How come they can’t understand the issue shaking the very foundations of this country?

If all of the people of this kingdom were highschool boys then immediate execution for having five wives would still have been cute, highschool boys would’ve risen in a huge violent revolt, crying tears of blood? To think this is where an adverse effect from sending the geeks and idiots on an errand will show up, I mean, I am the only highschool boy here! Surrounded by enemies on all sides huh, speaking of which, I’d like soba as a side dish, but first we need to expand on dairy products. Mainly cheese and fresh cream. Aah, I want pizza, sausages would be nice too? I wonder how salami is made? But in terms of comfort food, it’s miso and tofu, and also seafood. They had soy sauce, so there should be a chance of miso being around too. And with that many pieces present, there should also be a food culture close to Japanese cuisine. But if that’s the case, then…

「Why are you muttering about miso soup in great detail when you are being scolded! Also, put seitan¹ in there too!」

Seitan, huh, I thought more of a clean broth soup, but I can make do with that too? No, it’s precisely because we can’t, since there aren’t any around, that I’m looking for it! But fugashi² sound very appealing too?

「No! Forget the broth, we were talking about the King! Why are you worried about ingredients for miso soup in the middle of the scolding about the King!」

「Ah~, totally forgot? I vaguely remember hearing or not hearing or not caring about hearing something of that sort a long time ago? But wouldn’t you agree that putting white noodles in miso soup is a heresy?」

「「「「Forget about miso soup! And please think about the King! 」」」」

Well, whether the King should return, abdicate, be beaten up or burned can be considered later. He is Royal Girl’s father so I would feel bad abandoning him. While he might be an irritating old man of a king with a harem of five wives which super pisses me off, even so, Royal Girl is a good princess who gave a lot of enjoyment with those nice thighs, lovely back, and alluring cleavage, and even brought Maid Girl with her, so I’m particularly reluctant to help one or two old fools, but I wouldn’t go as far as to say that I doesn’t piss me off. Well, let’s burn him if he pisses me off after recovering.

But not now. Now is not the time. It is still too early for that. For now, to make sure his condition doesn’t get worse I give them only a mushroom potion to recover strength, an antidote, and health potion (weak).

After all, the Confederation is still unharmed. Even if they pull back here, there will be a next time. Until I carve a deep, deep wound, deeper than a fatal one, one that will shut down any prospects of a next time, it’s far too early to end this. I still have to plunder all of the money from the trash nobles and the Confederation and then even their pocket money, and kya kya ufufu highschool boys dreams, hopes, and adventures in the lonely night stores of the capital, going on a great adventure to have an action-packed magnate time in the night of the Capital where whirlwind of highschool boy desires rages? I still have to become a rich man?

Well, in any case, ripping off can never go wrong. Ripping off is justice. Getting ripped off is a great evil, if I get to do it then it’s justice. That is the very message of my attack on the Confederation.

[TL Notes:

[1] Seitan is a mildly flavored, high-protein meat substitute made of wheat gluten.

[2] Fugashi is a candy made from dried wheat gluten coated with muscovado. Very popular through the 20th century but are known to exist all the way from the Edo era, so from the 17th century. ]

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