Chapter 2: Rabbits are Delicious
The rowdy forest had turned so silent that not even the sound of critters could be heard.
The gray-robed woman sat cross-legged on the carcass of a massive tiger in a daze, having that same frail look from before. After a moment of silence, she sighed and muttered to herself, “Sigh… How tiring. It’s time to return home!”
With that said, she slowly got off the tiger carcass and rubbed her flat stomach. She was feeling a little hungry. She surveyed the demon carcasses of all shapes and sizes around her. Since she had come here, she might as well… have supper?
After some thought, she turned and walked up to the snow-white Rabbit Monarch on her right. But just as she was about to reach for its tail to drag it away, the supposedly dead Rabbit Monarch suddenly came alive.
(⊙ o ⊙)
It did not flee after it leaped up; instead it began kowtowing to her, producing a series of thuds against the ground.
“Exalted Immortal, please spare me! I was wrong, I had been entertaining angels unawares yet have offended you!” Covered in snot and tears, the Rabbit Monarch’s massive head repeatedly struck the ground forcefully. Its body was trembling so vigorously that waves were flowing down its rabbit fur.
“You were feigning death?” The woman blinked before squatting down before the rabbit.
The Rabbit Monarch trembled even more vigorously. “Exalted Immortal, please have mercy on me! I am just a mere rabbit monarch. I’m not like them. I only eat grass and have never eaten a human before! I have elderly rabbits and young rabbits to care for. I am even pregnant with a whole fluffle of them. I can’t die now! Please, spare me!”
She was just too horrifying. The Rabbit Monarch had never seen anyone with a cultivation so high. Despite looking weaker than a mortal, she was able to vanquish over ten thousand demons in the blink of an eye. Furthermore, nine of them were tenth-stage Demon Monarchs. Despite the complete lack of methodology in her movements, she had wiped out more than ten great demons with a single swat. The demons were all dead before they figured anything about her strength.
Terrifying… just too terrifying…
It was no wonder not a single demon who had left the Demon Realm in the past three months returned—such a powerful individual could destroy every demon in existence within a couple of hours.
“You are pregnant with bunnies?” the woman suddenly asked.
“Y-yes.” The Rabbit Monarch nodded as it subconsciously tried to suck in its tummy.
“Oh.” The woman fell into a momentary daze before nodding at it. “Congratulations!”
“Ah?!” The Rabbit Monarch was taken aback as it instinctively replied, “Th-thank you?” What was the meaning of this? Did she have her sights on the bunnies in its tummy?
“Have you really never eaten a human before?”
“Yes, yes!” The Rabbit Monarch nodded its head frantically. “I cultivate in the Way of the Herbivore. Look at my fur, there isn’t the slightest bit of blood or grievance on it.”
“I see. You may leave then!” The woman waved her hands carefreely and instructed, “Remember to eat more grass when you return and continue bearing more grass-eating rabbits.”
“Ah! Ah?” The Rabbit Monarch was completely dumbfounded as it widened its eyes in disbelief. “You plan on… letting me go?”
“Yup.” The woman nodded. Moments later, she added vaguely, “Supper is fattening.”
The Rabbit Monarch found it unbelievable to be so easily spared. It glanced at the demons carcasses scattered across the land. “A-are… you really not going to kill me?”
“It’s not like I have any interest in slaughtering little animals. Why would I lie to you?” The Rabbit Monarch did not eat humans after all.
“B-but… we rabbits were the ones that suffered the greatest casualties when we exited the Demon Realm…” The Rabbit Monarch spoke halfway before covering its mouth immediately. More than a hundred demons had died in the past three months, of which a third were rabbit demons.
“Well…” The woman did not show the least bit of anger. Instead, she seemed to give the matter some serious thought before replying, “That does seem to be the case.”
“And?”
“Well, that’s because rabbits are delicious!”
“… What?!” What the heck was that reason?
(╯°Д°)╯(┻━┻
However, the woman maintained her languidness as she babbled on in all seriousness, “Look… Deer meat is too tough; fox meat has a stench; tigers are protected animals, so I don’t really dare to eat them. As for snake meat, it has too many bones…” She began counting with her fingers, one animal at a time before concluding, “That’s why, you rabbits are still the best. Yes… delicious!”
The Rabbit Monarch felt bitterness rise up in it. So the reason why the rabbits had suffered such great casualties was because of the quality of their meat! It didn’t want to be delicious at all!
Wait a moment!
A nearly ludicrous answer surfaced in the Rabbit Monarch’s mind. “So, Exalted Immortal, the reason why you killed those demons was to…”
“Eat, of course!” The woman replied matter-of-factly. “I need to live too.”
“…” So the reason why there were no remains left from those demons was because they were used as food? Wasn’t grain abstinence a fundamental requirement for human cultivators? That bunch of liars from the Six Schools Three Sects!
(╯°Д°)╯(┻━┻
“Oh, it’s different this time.” The woman suddenly recalled something as she pointed to the demon carcasses on the ground and clarified, “I live in a straw cottage nearby. The lot of you were still making a din despite it being so late; thus, waking me up. And you know… who doesn’t have a morning temper? That’s why I came over to take a look.”
“…” The reason why so many demons died was simply because they were too loud?
The Rabbit Monarch felt taken aback by the harsh realities of the world. It realized that the woman was about to turn and leave after having explained herself. Perhaps it was due her casual tone which stood in contrast to the power she possessed that the Rabbit Monarch suddenly mustered the courage to carry out a bold plan.
“Exalted Immortal, please wait a moment!”
The woman stopped in her footsteps and turned around to say, “Is there anything else?”
“E-exalted Immortal!” The Rabbit Monarch tried its best to repress its fear. “I might be able to provide some assistance if you lack any ingredients for your meals. We rabbit demons are numerous in number and we are scattered across an extensive piece of land. We can procure all sorts of food for you. Why not…” It took a look at the woman to gauge her response before gulping down a mouthful of saliva and biting the bullet to continue, “What do you think about me delivering ingredients for your meals punctually every day?”
“Ah, you can do that?” The woman’s eyes lit up for a moment before dimming in the next. “But I don’t have money for food delivery.”
What the heck is food delivery?
“Exalted Immortal, it’s a way for me to show my respect for you. There is no need for you to pay me!”
“But that would be too embarrassing…” The woman’s face blushed suddenly as she scratched her head awkwardly. “Won’t it be inconveniencing you greatly?”
“No no no, not at all!” Overwhelmed by the flattery, the Rabbit Monarch hurriedly shook its head.
“Oh, thank you then.”
“It’s only right to do so,” said the Rabbit Monarch with a fawning smile. Only then did it muster the bit of its rabbit guts to mention its motive. “Then… the next time we rabbits leave the Demon Realm, is it possible for you to… spare them?”
“Sure!” The woman nodded without any hesitation. “It’s fine as long as they don’t eat humans.”
“Exalted Immortal, rest assured. They are all herbivores.” The Rabbit Monarch reeled in disbelief. It had never expected the woman to be so agreeable to its proposal. Furthermore… she was rather polite. “It’s settled then. I will deliver food to your residence from tomorrow onwards.”
“I will be troubling you then.”
“It’s no trouble at all.”
“If there is nothing else, I’ll be heading back to bed.”
“Exalted Immortal, take care!”
“Goodbye!”
“Exalted Immortal!”
“Oh?”
“May I know how I should address you?”
“Oh, my name is Shen Ying.”
“Exalted Immortal Shen, take care…”
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