What was that? Heaven had never felt a touch like that before. His cold fingers around her ankle sent a warm tingling sensation up her leg, in a way she had never felt before. She had felt his skin against hers, so much that she could tell the texture and the exact temperature. It was strange and frightening.
Zamiel waited patiently for her to respond.
"No, I was just… your hands are cold." She replied, extending her leg again.
"They are usually cold. Does it bother you?" He asked.
"No, no." She shook her head with a smile.
He nodded and then reached for her leg again. This time, he touched her even more gently. "Is it less cold now?" He asked.
"Yes," the hot water made his hands less cold than what they were in the beginning, even though that wasn't what had shocked her.
Holding her leg, he stroked the washcloth on her skin, but Heaven could only focus on his hand against her skin. Every time he moved his hand, his skin brushing against her own, she felt the same sensation as before. A warm tingling feeling that slowly traveled up her leg and as his hand moved upwards the more unbearable the electrifying feeling became.
Zamiel noticed her stiffness and gazed up at her.
Heaven's heart raced. What was he going to say? She was acting strangely.
"I am trying to be gentle, but it seems you are still in pain," he said.
Heaven didn't realize that she had been holding her breath when she finally exhaled.
"No, I am alright. I can do it alone." She reached her hand out for the cloth.
"Alright," he said, handing it to her. "I can help you with your hair and back."
That would be better than her thighs, she thought, but she was wrong.
His hands on her back were as distracting, if not more, and when he came around her shoulders and neck, a sigh left her mouth.
What was this? This was more than arousal. This was euphoric.
She had been curling her toes and straining the muscles in her legs until they became sore. Then suddenly came a sharp pain when he touched her head. She bit her lip to stop herself from complaining as he continued to gently wash her hair. Once she was clean, he went and held the towel open for her. Heaven got out of the tub and went to be wrapped in white towel.
Zamiel then helped her dry her hair and comb it. Heaven watched him through the mirror. It wasn't the first time he had taken care of her like this. A few memories became clearer, and she remembered the time he bathed her and braided her hair.
"I would like braids," she said.
He looked at her in the mirror and smiled. "Anything you like," he said.
Every time his fingers brushed her neck and shoulders, she almost shivered. It was like his touch ignited sparks along her skin. Did it always feel like this? She couldn't quite remember how his touch felt, which caused her to panic a little. She tried to recall their first kiss and their first time making love. How did she feel? B
How…?
She couldn't remember.
Her first kiss! She couldn't forget it.
Hastily, she stood up from her seat and stared at herself in the mirror. Something was wrong with her.
"What is wrong?" Zamiel asked.
"Our first kiss. I can't remember it. I can't remember our first kiss? I need to remember it." She began hyperventilating and getting away from her seat.
"Heaven," Zamiel approached her slowly, but she backed away from him. "You are tired right now and you have been through a lot. You died and came back. You need to give yourself time to recover."
She died, so she needed more time to heal. She knew that and it made her a bit calmer, but the panic was still there. What if she never recovered? What if she lost her memories the way she lost her humanity?
At first she had only thought that she had forgotten faces, like Zamiel's face and her children's faces, but now it was even special moments in her life.
Afraid of discovering what more she could have forgotten she didn't try to see if she could remember her wedding, or the day she gave birth clearly. She would be devastated if she couldn't remember those moments in vivid detail.
"Why don't you get dressed?" He suggested. "I'll bring Nadine and Eugene."
Zamiel knew that seeing their children brought her happiness even in her saddest moments. She missed her children, but she was afraid to see them. What if she didn't feel the same way about them? What if this change not only took her memories but other qualities of hers as well?
Heaven worried a lot as she got dressed, but as soon as her children walked through the door to her chamber she forgot all her worries.
"Mama," they ran to her and Heaven crouched and opened her arms for them. They ran into her embrace and at that moment she forgot about the rest of the world.
She held them close, smelled them and kissed them. The love for her children overwhelmed her and tears filled her eyes. How could she have forgotten the faces of her own flesh and blood? Her breath, her reason to live and her happiness. They were her everything.
"Mother, are you still hurting?" Nadine asked.
"No, my princess. "Mother is alright and strong as always." She assured her stroking her hair.
Heaven looked at both of them, imprinting their faces in her mind so that she would never forget them again.
Zamiel just stood there, watching them with a smile. "Mother must be hungry. Let's eat together." He suggested.
All four sat in their garden to have lunch. Heaven had been in her garden many times before, but it felt like the first time when she walked outside. She could feel the soft breeze against her face, smell the green grass and the flowers in a way she never did before. She could hear the birds chirping and feel the warm sunrays on her skin. Her garden looked more beautiful to her eyes, and everything seemed brighter and more colorful.
The aroma of freshly cooked food filled her nostrils and she knew what they were going to have for lunch before the maids even arrived with the food. Even the taste of it felt different. She knew what every dish was made of and the season used. Food that she had eaten before felt strange against her tongue and she had to force herself to eat. There was definitely a lot she needed to get used to, now when she was a demon.
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