Chapter 113. Qualifications of the Mind (18)
Apparently, my mother misunderstood.
She thought that I was so depressed that I didn’t want to go with Robert to destroy the origins of black magic.
Or, that it was burdensome to say that I was the hope of the commoners or the best commoner of this era.
“It’s not like that, mother.”
The reason I was so depressed was for personal reasons that were so ridiculous in this situation.
I was the hope of the commoners, the best commoner of this era, and the chosen hero who could discover the origins of black magic, I…
‘I have to decide what to do with Ian.’
Right now, before the decisive battle, I am showing my confusion.
“Mom.”
I said abruptly as I wiggled my fingers.
“Have you ever done something crazy?”
My mother looked me in the eye, and she didn’t ask ‘why’, but started talking.
“Well… When Aaron was very young, about 20 years ago.”
“Yeah.”
“It was when your father’s little restaurant was just booming. It was just word of mouth.”
I blinked and grabbed the blanket.
The stories of my parents that I didn’t know were always interesting.
“But one day, it wasn’t until two days later that we found out that we were using spoiled ingredients. It was the kitchen assistant’s mistake.”
“Ah.”
“Obviously someone had a stomach ache or something, but there were no complaints.”
I blinked my eyes and looked at her.
If it was the former Annabelle Nadit, she would of course say, ‘Whoever protested should just wash their mouth.’
“After thinking all night, we put up a notice at the restaurant the next day and let everyone in our area know about it.”
“…What?”
“What if even one person is suffering but they do not know the cause of the pain? Of course, if you close your eyes, nothing will happen. But we didn’t want to go through that awkwardness for the rest of our lives.” (pr/n: Annabelles parents are amazing :,) )
It was not easy to openly admit the wrongdoing even though there were no visible problems in the restaurant that had just started to take place.
“Of course, most of the people asked for a refund, and there were a lot of protesters. Sales had also dropped a lot. In fact, we were on the verge of bankruptcy…”
“Ah…”
“Still, I don’t regret doing that. From a business standpoint, customers are the most valuable people, and it makes no sense to keep secrets from them.”
I swallowed dry saliva and nodded. Obviously my parents had a completely different life trajectory than Caitlyn or Reid.
If I had been raised by my parents from a young age, I would have grown up properly, although it was a bit strange. (pr/n: I think she would probably be a better swordsman than ian because if she was almost as good as him with terrible training she probably would have better with the best care)
I would not have planned a crime to win a swordsmanship contest.
In fact, it was my past that kept me hesitating until now.
I liked Ian, but it was true that I had tried to commit crimes against Ian before.
Even if it was before I remembered my previous life, even if I was just sympathizing with Reid’s plan.
I just went out to forcibly bury the things I had done with a bad heart, but I started to get entangled with Ian in a different way.
Pls read only at pink muffin tl.
Of course, it was true that I thought for a while whether I would rather accept it and tell him about that part of life.
But should I just wash my mouth and start dating Ian just because those things didn’t happen?
If we got married, I would have to hide those secrets for the rest of my life. Was that right?
And what if it turned out to be an unexpected factor?
‘Do I have to live with that anxiety for the rest of my life?’
Even if it was just a coincidence, if the topic of that time comes up, how startled I would be on the inside…
To harm him with drugs, poison, terrorism, and even illegal magic items that were mobilized. That was a different crime from a mean sudden attack from behind and reckless swearing. It wasn’t like I got a prison ending in the original work for nothing.
Now Ian liked me. But even if I knew I was going to commit a crime against him, would he still like me?
That thought kept circling around, and I was troubled all this time.
It wasn’t easy, to be honest, and suggest, ‘would you like to date the woman who planned a crime against you?’
It was terrifying to see Ian’s cold and disappointed face again. And I was afraid that Leslie would despise me, even if no one knew about it.
In the end, the answer was to lie and walk away by saying, “I don’t like you.” As I had initially decided, if I lived a life that had nothing to do with Ian, I could bury the past.
Of course, that was also telling a lie, so I kept hesitating because I didn’t want to…
Surprisingly, after talking with my mother, I felt like I could clearly see the way to go.
If I were really Annabelle Rainfield, what would I do if I were the child of my parents?
The answer was obvious.
“But why do you even say that?”
“I think that if you want to treat a person sincerely, there should be nothing hidden, no matter how dark your heart is. There is no law that says so, but I just lived my life that way.”
My mother had already revealed to me the darkness that I did not need to say out loud. She proudly revealed her secrets.
I really wanted to treat Ian purely, so I didn’t want to hide anything. Especially if we are in such a deep state.
‘In the end, even if I don’t connect with Ian, I want to be proud. I don’t want to avoid my past mistakes just because I’m scared.’
As my mother said, there was no law that says so, but I just wanted to live that way.
“Thank you, mother.”
Once I made up my mind to be shaken, I felt relieved.
“Well, my worries are over now.”
Even if it was scary and frightening, even if everything I had built up until now was at stake, it was right to honestly admit and confess my mistake.
‘Ian Wade is a person I really like.’
I didn’t want to hide anything from him.
In my mind, I dismissed all the lies I had been thinking about until now, such as ‘you don’t look like a man’.
If I met Ian on the coast of Banafarim, I would tell him everything honestly and tell him my heart.
‘I like you, but I used to be such a bad person.’
Even if he despised me, even if he cursed that he didn’t want to see me again, I’d accept it. And I would send him to the swordsmanship competition so that he could win the final.
I closed my eyes slowly, feeling my mother’s gentle touch.
“Mother… I’m really sorry.”
“What?”
“It’s just because of me that you keep staying at the Duke of Wade and can’t even go to the dressing room… There are a lot of people who praise me, but things keep going up and down despite the bad rumors… And then you had to hear Marquis Abedes say bad things…”
“Annabelle, I told you not to say that.”
“But.”
I continued as my mother rubbed my cheeks.
“I hope this is all over soon and my family can live safely and comfortably again… If only I could be a proud daughter… I’m Annabelle Rainfield, not Annabelle Abedes, so I wish everyone would acknowledge this happy heart…”
Even if I couldn’t connect with Ian, it would be okay if I was seriously hurt because he criticized me.
I wanted to be a proud and good daughter to my precious family. This time, by all means, I was determined to finish everything by ending Carlon.
~*~
(3rd person pov)
Aaron narrowed his eyes and watched Annabelle for several days.
She was strange these days.
Of course, she was originally a little weird, but she was even weirder now.
‘Everyone said it was after she entered and came back from the palace, but…’
Aaron tilted his head as he looked at Annabelle with her arms and legs crossed.
“I think it was after the banquet.”
What the hell happened at the banquet, for her to look like a broken kokeshi doll?
This was a good opportunity for him to care about Annabelle like this, in Ian’s absence.
Shortly after the banquet, Ian left somewhere.
As a person who usually just went away and came back after doing something just, no one cared about it, and no one in the Empire cared about Ian’s safety either.
So Aaron was able to observe Annabelle while playing around.
And a few more days passed.
Annabelle didn’t hide particularly, she said she was leaving to get rid of the origins of black magic with Robert, and they would be accompanied by a few knights.
The rumors that had swept through the capital once and then calmed began to stir up again.
And early that morning, Annabelle called Aaron without their parents’ knowledge.
“I thought so.”
Aaron said seriously.
“Speak quickly. What kind of accident did you have?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I have already noticed that you have been a bit crazy since you went to the banquet.”
“Accident…”
Annabelle sighed once, not denying anything.
“…Yes, there was… It’s a bit odd though. Anyway, I have something for you to do.”
“For me?”
“Yes. You don’t have to do it if you don’t like it.”
“Let me hear it first.”
Aaron asked nervously.
“If the crime becomes too serious, we can’t be together…”
“What do you see me as…?”
Annabelle grunted as she cut him off.
“I just wanted to say that if I don’t make it to the swordsmanship contest, you should go instead.”
Aaron’s expression hardened.
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