Chapter 55: Men of the Gu Clan
When Third Young Master Gu woke up the second day, his eyes were markedly hazy as if still lost in a dream. Yu Xiaoxiao was already munching on a giant meatbun in her mouth and standing at the foot of the bed. She waved at him with her left hand and said, “Today’s breakfast is meatbuns, hurry up and eat some.”
Gu Xinglang watched Yu Xiaoxiao’s little mouth take bites of meatbuns. Naturally, the ones made in a military family’s kitchen were thick and full of filling. Yu Xiaoxiao was able to eat a third in one bite even though Gu Xinglang barely saw her mouth move. “Wha,” he swallowed. “What did we do last night?”
Yu Xiaoxiao said, “Last night Jing Mo invited us to dinner, then we ate street food at the big stone bridge.”
“I’m saying h-here, in this room,” Gu Xinglang’s face was about to flush scarlet again. Because his trousers were dry, he couldn’t confirm the events of last night, or whether he and Yu Xiaoxiao had really done that. Did the princess really relieve him with her hands once?
Yu Xiaoxiao turned to grab another meatbun from the table. “In this room? I rubbed you until you shot it out, ah. Don’t you remember?”
Gu Xinglang’s face flamed. It really happened!
Yu Xiaoxiao saw Gu Xinglang’s embarrassed face and couldn’t understand him. “Why are you embarrassed after waking up? Last night, you were even humping against my hand, you–”
“Don’t say any more,” Gu Xinglang wanted to hide in a crack in the ground. Now he remembered all the details on this bed yesterday. With no cracks in sight, he did something very childish: pull the covers over his head and burrow himself underneath.
Yu Xiaoxiao finished her third meatbun of the day and saw the man beneath the covers. She wasn’t sure if this was some sort of game between husband and wife in this world, so she asked, “What’s wrong with you? I know men get morning wood, so you want some again?”
Gu Xinglang flipped open the covers and looked at her with wide eyes. “Morning what? No wait, how did you know what to do?”
Yu Xiaoxiao shrugged. Wasn’t it just stroking and rubbing? If she saw enough of it, she’d naturally know how to do it herself. But taking into account her husband’s red-faced purity, she said, “Someone taught me, ah.”
None of the Gu Clan men or their ancestors had ever married a princess, so Gu Xinglang had no idea how things worked in the palace. When Yu Xiaoxiao said she’d been taught, he actually believed her. The imperial clan was so high and mighty that they did things differently from the common populace. That was normal. “W-was it your etiquette momo?” he asked.
Yu Xiaoxiao had no idea what etiquette was, so she just nodded. “Yes, ah.”
Who was Princess Linglong’s etiquette momo? Her wet nurse Wang momo? Third Young Master Gu had no idea. Wang momo lived deep in the palace and had never married, but actually taught the princess things between a man and a woman? How was she supposed to teach that?
“…….” Gu Xinglang didn’t dare to think too deeply past the first few seconds. Just like that, a somewhat less than sparkling misunderstanding was set.
“Want to eat some?” Yu Xiaoxiao was most concerned with food.
“Have someone help us change clothes,” Gu Xinglang said, “Isn’t it getting late? I’ll accompany you to the palace in a bit.”
“No need to trouble them, I’ll help you,” Yu Xiaoxiao declared.
When Gu Xinglang saw his wife reaching for his trousers again, he quickly yelled for his pageboys to come help. The two pageboys were already waiting in attendance outside and quickly shouted an affirmative before rushing inside. Yu Xiaoxiao saw Gu Xinglang’s red face and turned to leave the room. He’s so shy. When it’s time to shoot his gun, will he even know where to put it in? And he’s even a general. I wonder if they’re all so innocent in this world.
Xiao Zhuang and Xiao Wei were standing outside beneath the eaves. Both had already finished their breakfast and were waiting for the princess and royal son-in-law to go to the palace. Seeing them, Yu Xiaoxiao asked, “Have you eaten?”
“Princess, both us servants have eaten,” Xiao Zhuang replied, “How about the Royal Son-in-Law?”
“He hasn’t gotten up yet,” Yu Xiaoxiao said, “Last night I helped him shoot a load, so Little Gu doesn’t want to see me right now.”
Xiao Zhuang and Xiao Wei were struck dumb. Why are you telling us these things? What if someone silences us with death for hearing it? Can’t the imperial clan spare us?!
Yu Xiaoxiao stuffed the fourth meatbun of the day into her mouth before sweeping her gaze at XIao Zhuang and Xiao Wei’s faces. They too were men in the prime of their youth. Who knew if they’d panic if a real woman hooked up with them one day too?
Xiao Zhuang said dazedly, “T-then is the Royal Son-in-Law not coming to the palace today?”
“He’s going,” Yu Xiaoxiao said. “He’s a little shy right now, so just give him some time to adjust.”
Xiao Wei cough dryly a few times and decided to skip the subject entirely. If this went on, even the Gu Clan would want them dead. The right and proper Third Young General feeling shy in bed? That went against all imagination, alright?!
“Did you catch a cold?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked Xiao Wei with concern.
Xiao Wei said, “Princess, this servant heard that White Tiger Nation’s Grand Marshal Zuo You (左佑) arrived in the capital yesterday.”
“Zuo You? (左右)“ Yu Xiaoxiao echoed. Left (左) and Right (右)? “There’s someone with a name like that?” She ran over her memories and felt relieved, because Left-Right wasn’t one of the cruel female emperor’s lovers.
Xiao Zhuang and Xiao Wei exchanged glances. What’s wrong with a name like Zuo You? (左佑)
“Is he here to demand hostages too?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked.
Xiao Wei shook his head. “He shouldn’t be. Zuo You just finished fighting with Royal Son-in-Law at the North Wolf Pass and lost. He’s probably here because of that battle.”
“Who lost and who won?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked next. She didn’t care where North Wolf Pass was, but she needed to know the losers and victors.
“Royal Son-in-Law won, ah,” Xiao Zhuang cried, before saying resentfully, “But Zhao Beicheng stole all the credit.”
Yu Xiaoxiao understood. This man was the start of Gu Xinglang’s sufferings, and now the “start” was here.
Gu Xinglang quickly changed into his robes and polished off some breakfast. He didn’t go to pay respects to Old Madam, but directly took Yu Xiaoxiao to the carriage and rushed for the palace. Once husband and wife departed, Gu Xingyan brought Wei momo and the sleeping Yu Ziyi in her arms out of a side door in the Gu Estate. She and the baby got into a carriage, while he personally drove it towards the western gates of the city.
“Let’s go,” Gu Chen said to Old Madam from the doorway once Gu Xingyan’s carriage was out of sight.
Old Madam murmured, “Xingyan will return safe and sound, right?”
The old patriarch only turned to enter the gates. “Since when have any of our Gu Clan men feared death?”
Hearing this, tears flowed down Old Madam’s face.
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