Sonorous laughter resounded on the cold mountain.
"Pftt— Hahahahaha! As expected of him!"
It started with the unlucky monk but then quickly spread to all the members who had been to the D.L. school.
The monks' faces were just so damn hilarious! They were gasping, utterly speechless after hearing about Josh's new "enlightenment". Fuck the world?! What the hell?!
What was worse? That he had thought of this in the first place or that it had actually worked?! Had they been wasting their lives all this time?! They simply couldn't believe it.
The merchant was also gawking at them, puzzled. What did they mean by as expected?!
Dale chuckled as he explained:
"If you ever check the AT rankings, then you'll understand. It's not the first time he accomplishes an exploit that looks crazy. On a few instances, his result is just: ∞."
The others chimed in:
"It's very shocking the first time or the second, but when not when he freaking does it every time!"
"Master tends to defy what other people call common sense."
"At some point, you just get used to it."
They all explained, sharing their wisdom, the merchant finally nodding in understanding. That's when the Elder finally snapped out of it, giving a sigh:
"Josh, thank you for this. Just witnessing the aura you showed should be enough to help the youngsters progress, truly thank you!" Then he added in a low voice.
"It would be nice if my old friend could have witnessed this. I wonder how he would have reacted, haha."
"Do you mean my mentor?" The unlucky monk asked in a soft voice, with the other nodding. Both seemed pensive as he spoke again.
"You're right. If only he could have seen this, I'm sure he would have been jubilant. He was such a great man, and the people he left behind are missing him. I just hope that his soul is at peace."
It was possible to hear the sorrow in his voice as he sighed, remembering the beautiful past. His tremoring voice was a testament to how close they had been.
The Elder felt it and, for the first time, approached him, even patting his back in sympathy, ignoring his bad luck aura. It was such a touching moment that many started to tear up.
"Yes, he really should have stayed…." The Elder sighed.
"I just wish he was alive to see us."
"What?!"
"What is it, elder?" The unlucky monk asked respectfully for once.
"You do know he's not dead, right? He's just exploring the world to reach rank 5…."
"0_0?!"
Wait, what?! It turned out that the man he thought he had killed with his bad luck…..was actually alive?! So much for the tragic backstory! So much for the tear-jerking!
The merchant was the first to cry out:
"Why the fuck are you two looking so sad if he's still alive then?! Give me back my sympathy!" He couldn't freaking believe it!
"Wait…if he's not dead, then why the heck did you tell me that we'd probably never see him again?!"
"Bad sense of directions." The Elder nodded seriously.
"Seriously?! What about looking for him?!"
"It takes time, and it's costly." The Elder explained.
"..."
Thus ended an emotional tribute to a dead mentor that was apparently still alive and kicking— somewhere...
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
After such an awkward moment, there was nothing better to clear the air than....* Drum roll* A monastery tour!
It turned out that not even the monks themselves had seen the interior. They had all been waiting for Josh to be back for the grand reveal.
The building was unnecessarily large yet remained austere-looking. Even if it was newly built, it gave the feeling of an archaic stone castle having somewhat survived through the ages.
"Pretty neat, right? We made sure that it was monastery-like." Bob gave him a wink as he led the way, describing everything.
"Right here, we have the entrance doors. They look like wood, feel like wood, smell like wood, and taste like wood— or so I've been told."
Who the fuck ate wood?! One had to be crazy to do that, right? But then, many unconsciously glanced at Josh. Perhaps that was something he'd actually do…
"Now there's a cool feature about them. They're incredibly heavy, but it's possible to adjust the weight. This way, you can use it as a strength training method or mess with people."
In the background, a monk was going, "Hey, that's my idea! Nice!"
The visit had just started that it was very apparent that this monastery would be neither plain nor simple.
"Now, this is the entrance hall. It has been made with the cooperation of the Universal Tech team and is extremely secure. Any invader will find itself confronted with many deadly traps. It will help to keep the monastery safe."
Monk A: "Ah, what if we activate it by mistake?!"
Monk B: "We've never been attacked before..."
Monk C: "Does it protect against avalanches?"
"Oh, no worries. It won't ever attack the residents, it can even deal with most Climbers, and the building itself is avalanche resistant, so no need to worry!" bob reassured them.
It could deal with Climbers?! This was just the entrance! Wouldn't there be even crazier last recourse defensive methods?! Probably!
"Here we have the sleeping quarters. The light, sounds, beds, and walls are adjustable. It's possible to have the room be completely empty, one big room with tons of beds or even plenty of individual rooms."
Monk A: "Beds?! Oh my god!"
Monk B: "Why would we want individual rooms?"
Monk C: "Yeah, that's weird, but we can remove the beds to meditate here!"
The last one excitedly remarked, with the others gasping in realization. This was so great! They tried a few settings, at some point turning the entire room into a complete maze!
"Actually, if you wish to train, there is a dedicated room for that." Bob promptly showed them the way.
"There are plenty of machines to train your strength, your endurance, and your speed. There is a gravity chamber in the back, and you can also call upon killer robots to help with combat training. Just be careful: they can be pretty strong."
This place looked like it was made to train super soldiers. Hell, the cheaper Climber school probably didn't have that nice a set-up! What the hell?! Wasn't this overkill?!
A few monks were obviously concerned:
Monk A: "Brother, do we even need this?"
Monk B: "It does look a tiny bit dangerous with the robots."
Monk C: "Fools, I'm the one that asked for this! Just think about it! If we're in better physical shape we'll be able to meditate longer!
They all gasped in realization before nodding in agreement, but then one shy monk in the back reminded them.
Monk D: "G-guys? Won't we go hungry faster if we train so much? Won't we starve?"
Bob chuckled as he gestured them to keep following, about to rock their world once more.
"This here is the cafeteria. State-of-the-art U-Bot chefs will prepare balanced meals. While it's not Climber's food, it's otherwise the best anyone could ask for and very nutritious!"
On this one, all the monks' eyes were shinning. Food! Real food! They had lived their lives only eating coarse rice, and this was worlds apart! Bob even ordered a dish for them.
Monk A: "Oh my god, this looks amazing!"
Monk B: "Pinch me, someone. There are actual fresh vegetables in there!"
Monk C: "It tastes amazing too! If I were to die right now, my life wouldn't have been in vain!"
They looked like children that had just gotten candies but with vegetables. Their blissful expressions were worth way more than the delicious but cheap meals.
"After a good meal, there is nothing better than the next room." Bob gave them a mysterious smile.
"Here we have the pool and the sauna! It goes from icy cold to fiery hot and is amazing to digest a meal. It also helps to enhance one's blood circulation!"
Monk A: "I can't wait to try it!"
Monk B: "It's always hot?! Won't that cost too much?!"
Monk C: "He said it's for blood circulation! Wouldn't that help us meditate afterward?"
This was enough to convince them. It seemed like they were able to relate absolutely anything in existence to meditating serenely. This was impressive in its own way…
Random Bullshit —> It helps to meditate! —> Monks onboard with it.
That's what had made them accept things they didn't particularly need so easily. But then another monk raised an issue.
Monk D: "About that....with all that, will we even have time to meditate or learn the scriptures?!"
Right!! What about the scriptures?! This was the most important for sure!
That's when Bob gave a confident smile.
"I was obviously keeping the best for last. Don't worry. You won't be disappointed!"
Why did that sound like more over-the-top features? Oh well...
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